Material Existentialism

I've had it said to me that there is freedom in owning things. Being able to buy nice things. It's part of growing up. Part of being an adult. The freedom to make lavish purchases at ones will. I've been thinking about that a lot lately. I think it's starting to feel a lot less true. I think I've been living my life along those lines for the last few years now. I've made several large and lavish purchases. Of really nice things. A 50" plasma television. A set of very nice couches. And other odds and ends. I feel like they're starting to weigh me down. They're just never enough. I buy an HDTV, and suddenly regular definition isn't enough, I need a high def cable box, which is more expensive to buy and monthly. Watching my regular definition movies isn't enough, now I need an upconverter to watch them in high def. The speakers on the tv aren't enough so I need a surround sound set up to accent everything. And now what I have isn't enough because there's
blu-ray, so now I want one of those things. It's also not enough to have nice couches. You suddenly need new tables, coffee tables and end tables to match them. And lamps to match them. And that's not enough to decorate so you need items to put on the tables to take up space and make everything else look better.

And having a good enough job to be able to afford all these things is the pinnacle of life. Or so I've been told. I was hanging out with my parents one day when they decided my dad needed a file cabinet. I expected this ordeal to last no longer than an hour. We would go to an office supply store and be on our way shortly thereafter. Instead, we went to a furniture store. Because apparently this file cabinet was going in the large open kitchen/living room. And apparently nothing but an expensive cherry wood file cabinet that matched the expensive cherry wood that the entire area was finished with would look good with the rooms motif. After weeks of searching, a cherry wood file cabinet was found. But upon bringing it to their house they realized that the color was ever so slightly off from the rest of the wood. So of course they needed to hire someone to come and figure out the exact tone of the existing wood so that he could then strip and refinish the file cabinet to match the existing wood. Maybe some day they'll be able to organize their files. I hope. And when I mentioned to them that I couldn't understand this relentless and multi hundreds of dollars pursuit of a file cabinet, they just told me it was part of the joys of being older and financially stable. My mom talked about it like their entire lives were hinging on this file cabinet. Like somehow their lives would finally be complete once their files were in order in a manner that matched the cabinets in the kitchen. It's almost as if she thinks her identity is dependant on it. Like if someone comes over and see's this sweeping grandiose kitchen with hardwood floors and beautiful cherry cabinets, and then finds out that my dads files are kept in a plain metal filing cabinet, this person will think less of my parents as people. And that if for some reason someone thinks less of them, they will actually somehow become less human. Less important.

I hope my life never gets to that point.

I'm starting to realize that the only thing that happens when you buy things, is that very soon afterwords, your things start to not be good enough. And you need to buy more and more things to accentuate the things you already have in order for those things to keep your interest. And soon newer and better things come out, and no matter how many accentuating things you buy, it won't compare to the newer and better things you could have. So you scrap the things you have. And buy new things. And then newer things to accentuate your new things with. And on and on and on. That doesn't even sound like freedom to me, let alone feel like it.
And maybe a lot of that is just my personality. I easily get sucked into the idea that I need more things for my things. But I also know there are people out there who have the ability to function normally and purchase things normally without this concept taking over their senses. I envy them.

I feel like I'm in chains. And I'm tired of it.

Long story short; does anyone want to buy a nice tv or some nice couches? I don't want them anymore. I want my life to simplify. I think that just existing anymore is complex enough as it is. I don't need all sorts of things making my already complex existence even more complex. If you don't have this problem then please buy this stuff so it can stop bothering me. Thanks.